My heart swelled with pride as I watched my older sister graduate from high school. I was so proud that she had made it and was off to college in Minnesota for the upcoming year. However, I was filled with uncertainty, and I was not sure who I was without her. I had grown up my whole life trying to be as close to as perfect as she was, but now I had to figure out who I was without her by my side. The year had taken a precarious turn. Surely it could not be that bad…
Once she left, I felt lost. Every day felt like I was moving through the motions. I knew that I was not her, but I did not know who I was. She was responsible, always doing chores and what she was told. I hated doing my chores, and I could not let anyone tell me what to do.
It was my sophomore year of high school, and I decided that I needed a change. I loaded myself with difficult classes, and I was also learning to become my own person. I filled up my schedule, and I was determined that I could find some club or extracurricular activity that would help me learn who I was. Even though we kept in touch, it still was not the same.
At the start of my junior year, I started to learn who I was. I met new people, and over time, they brought me out of my shell. They pushed me out of my comfort zone and helped me discover my true self. At times I still felt disconnected and unsure of who I was; however, they had shown me it was ok to not be my sister and helped me learn to love my different traits.
By the time I reached my senior year, I was finally comfortable in my own skin. I am still in several clubs and keep myself busy with harder classes. I have learned that I am not my sister, but I am ok with that. Watching her grow has been an inspiration to me, and now it is time for me to take my own steps, wherever they will take me.
There have been several studies about the experiences of an older sibling leaving a younger sibling for college. In my case, her leaving was an astounding gift that she had given me. It forced me to grow and evolve into the person I am today.
